8.19.2013

A little of Brazil in my farewell week.








8.14.2013

God has nothing to do with it

I saw this post on Facebook today and it really ticked me off. Firstly, it was just funny because of how idiotic it is. "Ignore and all will go Wrong". 
Let me break it to you, in case you don't already know: everything that is going to go wrong in your life, will go wrong anyway. Despite Facebook, despite God, sometimes, even despite yourself.
We often do things with the best of intentions. Er ... like ... giving up your entire life and moving to Brazil in search of brighter and better horizons? Yes.
But I think I was more pissed off about me wanting to comment, God has nothing to do with it, and stopping myself because I don't have the time or energy to start a shit storm. Really, enough shit already.
And then, I got to think: why is it that religious people are allowed to rub their fate on other people's faces but we don't get the same courtesy?
I'm not saying I don't believe in anything, as John Green's character put it in "The Fault In Our Stars", I believe in Something with capital S. It just so happens that my Something is here on Earth. Living among us. Deep inside human consciousness. Buried beneath all the bullshit we have to go through every day to find something that is as abstract as God himself: happiness.
I've seen it today though. My seven year old son was skipping on the way back from school. For me, that was divinity. It was the externalization of a feeling so pure I almost cried (in fact I'm tearing up a little just remembering) I felt amazingly happy to be able to see that. And felt exponentially more terrified to imagine a day when he wouldn't skip anymore. The day he'd be worrying about finding a job, then if he makes enough money, if he can pay rent ...
Then I was asking myself? How to break this cycle? How to stop my son from forgetting this feeling, this communion with divinity? Besides taking a vow of poverty and packing a backpack to go do volunteer work, I couldn't think of anything. Sure, we parents tell our kids what to do and how  to behave. But do we show them? How can he learn that the important things in life are already all inside of him, when he watches his mother (and father -- but really not qualified to speak for someone else) worrying about money (and the things that come with it) -- almost -- all of the time?
Is it now when God comes into play? Should I tell my son not to worry about a thing because God will provide? And if he "repost a miracle will happen tonight"? I'm sorry, but I think that is the easy way out.
I'm not a scholar on religion, but the common discourse is if something good happens to you is a blessing, if something bad happens it's God's will. Be a horrible person as much as you want, but if, in the end, you repent, everything will be O.K. Come on through the pearly gates and have fun!
I'm sorry, but that doesn't comfort me. Not at the least.
I think every person chooses to walk the path that seems less scary to them at the time, that's life. Some look up, some look down, and everyone MUST try to live the best way they can.
I don't want to be cynical, I'm just saying ... I've seen miracles and I've been to hell, but I'm yet to see God. 



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